Make Friends With Your Future Mother-in-Law

Kansas Wedding Articles » Wedding Etiquette

Any bride knows that they are about to become the most important woman in their future husband’s life. But so far, the most important woman in their husband’s life has been their mother. It is very helpful for any bride to become friends with their future mother-in-law before the wedding. Some brides do not meet their future mother-in-law very far off from the wedding. Developing a relationship with this woman who has been in their husband’s life is critical to the success of their marriage.

There are some things that most women do to make friends: they go shopping, they have lunch and they get their nails done together. These are just some very traditional “girly” things that women often do to bond a friendship. But if these things don’t quite appeal to you (or your mother-in-law), don’t worry – you can still develop a good relationship with this woman. A great way to develop a relationship with your mother-in-law before the wedding is to discover her interests. If one of her interests is cooking, ask her to show you how to cook some of her son’s favorite dishes. If one of her interests is museums, ask her to take you to her favorite one. Be a good listener and ask a lot of questions. Quite frankly, it is less important what you do together than it is that you do something together. Doing something together is a great way to help get to know each other.

Many brides worry that they are always going to have to please their mother-in-laws. This can be for some, a challenging relationship. Some mothers feel very threatened by the new woman in their son’s life. It is important to let your husband have a positive relationship with his mother. Try to keep your relationship with his mother and his relationship with her as two separate relationships. This isn’t always possible – but it is very helpful to try. When your mother-in-law can see you as an individual, she often can start to warm up and get to know you more as a person.

No relationship is perfect and this is important to keep in mind when it comes to dealing with your mother-in-law. You can ask women who have been happily married for forty years – and they may have some frustrating words to say about their mother-in-law. Acceptance is helpful. Your mother-in-law is unlikely to change her personality very much. You need to get along with her to the best of your ability. You are now a family and need to act like good family members.